Back to the {DAILY} grind.....

And it SUCKS!!!!!
Monday I started back at work. Sunday was hard and that night I had a major meltdown. I felt like I wasn't doing what's best for Colin. It breaks my heart. Steve, as always, was my rock. He calmed me down and reminded me that I am doing what's best for him. I'm not one of those mom's who feels that her baby shouldn't be around other kids or in daycare. I strongly believe that Natalie one of the reasons why Natalie is as well-rounded as she is has to do with her being in daycare! But let's face it..... Colin is a special needs baby and I feel like he needs "more" then Natalie did. More encouragement, more stimulation, more support, etc. I just want him to have the best chance at life. I know all mom's feel this way. I know he is in good hands, but they're not MY hands and that is what hurts.
Today, I was cuddling him during Natalie's piano lesson. He had a different "smell." It wasn't my "smell" and that made me sad.
I know that being around older children will be good for him! And let's face it.... Spring break can't be that far away, right????
So, until then I was give him hugs and kisses each evening when we're home. I will continue to remind myself that I am doing what's best for him.