GROW BABY! GROW!

When I was pregnant with Luke I felt very strongly that he would be a breastfed baby.  For those three days that he was alive, he was a terrible breastfeeder.  Wouldn't latch on, would fall asleep at breast (when he would latch!), and it was nothing but difficulties.  Then he developed jaundice and I received a lot of pressure from the nurses to get food into him to help the jaundice.  When we got home from the hospital, I finally threw my hands up, waved the white flag, and fed him formula.  It was very stressful.
When I was pregnant with Natalie I knew there was no way I wanted to go through that again.  Maybe it was because their pregnancies were so close together and at that point Luke's short life was still so recent and very raw.  For whatever reason, I decided to formula feed Natalie.  It was still too much of Luke and I didn't want to go there.
Fast forward to my pregnancy with Colin.  I decided to jump in and try the breastfeeding thing again.  I met Lavawn, the lactation consultant at my OB's office.  I attended one of her BFing classes at the end of August, a month before Colin was due.  I immediately felt comfortable with her and the ladies that were helping her with the class.  At that point, I knew it was something I could do.
The odds were definately stacked against me.  A lot of what I read online stated that babies with DS don't BF well due to low muscle tone in their mouth.  But I read so much about how it was really beneficial for them, like all babies, but especially babies with DS. 
WE DID IT!  Colin was born and I immediately worked with him on breast feeding.  He latched super well!  There was hope!

Looking back at my pregnancy, I have to laugh over Colin's weight.  Starting around 30 weeks and my weekly ultrasounds, I was always told what a "chunky" baby I had!  I started to fear that I was going to have a 10lb baby!  Natalie was 6.12 and born at 39weeks.  When I told my OB that she said, "Oh, he will totally be a larger baby!"  Grrrrrrreat.  At my last ultrasound, at 38 weeks, they told me he was weighing right at 8lbs - and I still had 2 weeks to go.  A week later, 39 weeks, my little guy was born weighing 7.2oz!  There was no 10lb baby!!!  By the time we left the hospital, he was down to 6.8oz.

The Monday after Colin was born, we went to Lavawn's for the 1st time (1st of MANY times!!).  She and I worked together and she gave me some tips for feeding Colin.  All of the sudden, my "chunky" baby became a "tiny" baby and I felt like my pediatrician was always freaking out over his weight.  I was checking in weekly and sometimes more with either Lavawn, or the pediatrician for weight checks.  I was a little disappointed in my pediatrician because I felt like she really wanted me to give up and switch to formula.  I wasn't going there!  I was determined to keep trying.  Around the 2 week mark, Lavawn and I introduced some formula to Colin for extra calories.  After nursing, I was supplementing another ounce of formula, sometimes mixed in with breastmilk (I had started pumping).  That supplementation increased little by little.  We introduced a nipple shield thinking that would help Colin transfer more milk.  We tried a 10-10-10 method.  10 minutes on one side, switch to the other side for 10min, then back to the 1st side for 10min.  When I would weigh him after feedings with Lavawn it appeared he was getting around 2oz from me.  One time Lavawn referred to him as an "ineffective nurser."  We still laugh about that.  I told her that she hurt his feelings!  Even though we kept trying different techniques, I was determined NOT to give up.   Little by little, his weight slowly started to increase.  At Colin's 1 month appointment he was in the 5th% on the DS growth chart (3rd% on the regular growth chart).  He still wasn't back to birthweight yet. 

Each feeding was a huge process.  I would nurse Colin, then supplement, then pump.  By the time it was done, it was almost time to start the process over again!  But I hung in there, with weekly weight checks, discouraging words from the dr and nothing but positive, supporting words from Lavawn. 

So, where are we at today?  Colin is 4months old, and this week he weighed in at 12.4oz!!!  BEAUTIFUL!  It was one of the first times that his doctor was really pleased with his weight.  On the DS growht chart, he was in the 50th%!!!!  Colin gets bottles most of the time with both breastmilk and some formula (my supply is not the greatest!).  I aim to nurse him at least 1x/day.  I laugh that the pump is my best friend.  Colin does wonderfully though when I put him to breast.  He never fights it.  I do still have to use the nipple shield though.  He just looses too much milk without it.  We had tried without the shield for a week once, that led to only a 1oz. weight gain.  So, I've come to the realization that we just have to use it.

I would not even allow myself to entertain the thought of giving up until Colin was 6wks old.  So much I read online said that 6wks was about the time that a lot of babies "get" the idea of breastfeeding.  Once I made it to 6wks my new goal was 8wks.  I took it week by week.  I kept reminding myself "never give up on a bad day!"  I've had plenty of bad days!!  Not-good weigh ins, not a lot of support from the pediatrician, a constant bacterial infection that I've had since mid-December (now on my 3rd round of antibiodics), lots of tears, etc, etc.  But through it all Lavawn gave me the support and positive words I always needed.  I've told her many times that she's my hero and she always tells me that I've her hero.  I don't know why she says that - I'm the one that couldn't have done it without her.

My new goal is to make it to 6 months.  My long-term goal is 1yr.  But I have to take baby steps.  I feel like I can do it.  We're in a good place these days.  What Colin and I do works for us and he appears to be gaining nicely (and there's no weekly weigh-ins!!).

Here are a few pictures from one of Colin's weigh-ins on January 5th with Lavawn.

She always talks to him before she sets him on the scale.  I always say to Colin, "Ok bud!  Give me big numbers!"

Here Colin is with our wonderful Lavawn!

Whew....  That was a long post!  I don't really know what my point is except DON'T GIVE UP!  Colin and I went through a lot and if someone had told me I was still be pumping and BFing him at 4 months I probably would have said they were crazy.  But the two of us have hung in there!